afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Viggo)
First of all: Gdansk is AWESOME.

Secondly, I have fic for you.

Title: The cautionary tale of Sean Astin
Pairing: Sean Bean / Viggo Mortensen
Rating: R maybe? Also, this pretty much qualifies as crack.
Word count: ~2.500
Disclaimer: No, this surprisingly is not true.
A/N: This is for [livejournal.com profile] evocates who wrote the loveliest Orlibean for me and whom I owed fic for a LONG time. Her prompt was “Five times Sean was embarrassed to be seen with Viggo”. This is Astin pov which means I cheated :). Also, this was written in something like three hours in the middle of the night, so I am not responsible for anything. – I suppose this can be read as a sequel to ‘Please enjoy responsibly‘.

Hello. My name is Sean Astin, but you can also refer to me as ‘the one sane person on the set of this movie’. Or, and personally I think this is the most appropriate, think of me as ‘the cautionary tale of why one should under no circumstances (not even under the danger of death) take up one’s friends’ offer to room with them’. At least not if all your friends are serious nutcases. )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (SO)
Title: How Knecht Ruprecht got the girl hot northern bloke
Pairing: Orlando/Sean
Rating: PG13
Word count: ~5.000
Disclaimer: None of this is true.
Summary: Orlando is the last to arrive at what will later become known as Viggo’s perverted Christmas dress up party. Terrible choices of costumes and revelations of the schmoopy kind ensue.

”Ho Ho –” the door is half opened and Santa Claus stops in the middle of his greeting. Blue eyes, peeking out between the massive hat and the even more voluminous beard, look Orlando up and down. Then Santa finishes pointedly, “Ho.” )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Vigbean forever)
Title: A lesson in the fine art of romance
Pairing and/or additional characters: Viggo/Sean B., most of the cast of LotR
Rating: NC17
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] dilleydalley
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: None of this is true.
A/N: Written for the [livejournal.com profile] slashylotr_xmas fic exchange for [livejournal.com profile] lijahlover

Request: I love to see a romantic getaway in a cabin with a cozy fire and candle light for atmosphere. Ending with a proposal and hot sex throughout would be amazing. I won’t do a death fic, I need a happy ending.

Viggo thinks Sean’s romantic skills are kind of lacking. Sean challenges Vig to outdo him. )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (KarlOrlando)
Title: Genesis
Pairing and additional characters: Orlando/Harry/Karl plus Viggo, Bean, Dom, Lijah, Billy, and Bernard
Rating: NC17
Word Count: 4.787
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] kitty_trio - thanks so much!
Warnings: none
Disclaimer: None of this is true.
A/N: Written for the [livejournal.com profile] slashylotr_xmas fic exchange for the gorgeous [livejournal.com profile] azewewish (I had SO much fun writing this!)

Request: ANY combination of Bean/Dom/Karl/Harry/Orlando. - No deathfic, rapefic, watersports or grown men acting like 12 year-old girls.

There are different versions of the beginning of all of this. Think about it as the genesis – no mere mortal was there to witness and the one / ones (never rule out polytheism, right?) that were involved, they won’t tell. – Only in this case, they do. )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Karl 2)
Title: www.get_the_truth_from_daisy.com
Pairing: Karl Urban / David Wenham
Rating: PG13
Disclaimer: Well, this is untrue. Honestly. Ask Dave.
Word Count: 1.516
A/N: In my pairing whoring post [livejournal.com profile] caras_galadhon asked for David/Karl to the prompt ‘by the lake’. I hope you like this, dear.

„So, Miranda is having Bernie’s lovechild.” )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (KarlOrlando)


Title: Four times Orlando kisses Karl and one time he doesn’t
Pairing: Orlando / Karl
Rating: PG13
Word Count: 1.490
Disclaimer: None of this is true.
A/N: Written as a Christmas present for [livejournal.com profile] galor5

For Galor5 )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Viggo)
So, I am trying to be a good girl and do my lesson preparing and stuff and don't seem to get anyfuckingthing done because the muse is whining at me, like, non stop to let it loose because it wants to go and play in the 'Doesn't paint' sandbox. I try to reason with it by saying that I very well can't go into my classes and tell them sorry, there'll be no Corean War / Verbosity / Schiller but, hey, I brought you pointless smut, how's that. The muse responds with things like 'It was not so hard to find you since you left me your address." The hurt in his voice was only barely audible but plain and loud for someone listening as closely as the artist. "Seriously, Sean." '. *whimpers* Treacherous Bitch.

Aaaanyway, since I really don't have time to write anything proper, hell, not even to type some of the Gran Canary results up atm, I thought I could share some fic with you sorta the old fashioned way :). So, don't be surprised once you clicked the link...

Title: I touch myself
Pairings: Viggo/Viggo, a hint of Orlando
Rating: R maybe?
Disclaimer: Yeah, right. Because I sat right next to Viggo when he did that. NOT.
Warning: Letting cliché!Viggo out of the closet?
A/N: I wrote this back in February on the beach of Phuket for [livejournal.com profile] giselleslash. I don't really recall why but I am sure she ASKED FOR IT :). This might be considered as a bit cracky.

On to the ficcie )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Well fucked)
First of all: Is LJ messing up dates of posting for anyone else as well? I wonder how I could possibly have posted that Karl/Eric fic on the 9th when today is only the 3rd?!

Aside from that: I am back home (in the country of Rain) and dog tired, will read flist and respond tomorrow, now: tub then bed. But three things before that:

1. Anyone willing to beta 2200 words of Orlando/Bean for me? No smut though, just a gen fic...

2. If you wanna see really gorgeous Orlando/Bean manips, you might want to check out this post in [livejournal.com profile] cadenadelreino's journal, trust me.

3. And again somewhat related regarding the Orlibeanage:

Title: When you whisper
Pairing: Sean Bean / Orlando Bloom
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Very much not true at all.
Word count: 173
A/N: Written for [livejournal.com profile] amygirl’s prompt “whisper”. And my question to you all: Who of the two would you say is the whisperer and who the listener :)?

Read more... )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Most loved muse)
Sorry for the disappearance act, RL has been awfully busy. Anyway I come bearing fic:

Title: Pretty thing
Fandom + Pairing: LotR RPS Karl Urban / Sean Bean
Rating: NC 17
Disclaimer: Completely and utterly made up.
Word count: 1143
AN: For [livejournal.com profile] azewewish who pointed out that Karl’s not getting enough.
A/N2: This is the fic formerly known as "Like flirting". I renamed it because I repeatedly mixed it up with "Flirtation (noun)" which is rather stupid of me :)

Read more... )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Orlando blue)
Title: Flirtation (noun)
Pairing: Karl Urban / Orlando Bloom
Rating: R
Word count: 268
Disclaimer: So totally not true, it’s sad.
A/N: [livejournal.com profile] azewewish prompted Karl/Orlando & flirtation (to make is SUPER easy) and foreseeably, Orlando plays hard to get :).

Read more... )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (mood Vig breathe)
Title: Daft bugger
Author: [livejournal.com profile] afra_schatz
Fandom: LotR RPS (NZ fic)
Pairing: Sean Bean / Viggo Mortensen
Rating: PG-R probably, if you don’t count my Viggo muse being a tiny bit of a lovesick angst queen, erm king ;)
Word count: 2440
Disclaimer: All made up, totally not true. Not making money with this.
A/N: Written for [livejournal.com profile] lorielen who gifted me with a lovely Sean banner for my LJ. Love you, darling.


Viggo tied his shoes. Yes, he not only owned shoes but also knew how to attach them to his feet so they didn’t come off when he started to walk. Viggo, against popular belief, also owned a hair brush that he now put to good use, or as good as possible. Damn, his hair really had grown long. )
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Faraboro cheers)
I can’t believe another year is over, Lori! So, again :), a happy birthday to you. May it be the first fantastic day of a fantastic new year full of broadening of horizons, taking up new, fulfilling challenges and of contentment and happiness. I love you, darling!

Title: Envy
Author: [livejournal.com profile] afra_schatz
Fandom: LotR RPS (NZ fic)
Pairing: Sean Bean / Viggo Mortensen
Rating: R
Word count: 1325
Disclaimer: All made up, totally not true. Not making money with this.
A/N: Written for [livejournal.com profile] lorielen’s birthday. Have a wonderful one, love!

Sometimes Sean envies Viggo. He doesn’t like that particular emotion that crawls up his spine and settles somewhere in the back of his throat, making everything taste slightly bitter. )

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