afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Default)
[personal profile] afra_schatz


[13/8/17, 9:05 a.m.]

“Hi, this is the voicemail of Sean Bean. Feel free to leave a message after the beep or call again later, in case of emergency, please call Jackson College under 01904 667700.”

Hello Sean, this is Orlando. See, this is how you start one of these. I just wanted to return the favour by calling you, and I hope that my call woke you up and while I am leaving you this message, you’re trying to figure out how your phone works. No need to try and deny it; I’ve seen you right after waking up plenty of times, you are the kind of bloke to throw a ringing mobile out of the window from sheer frustration. That would have been funnier if it hadn’t been my phone. Anyway, I have a list of things, so feel free to take notes, if that helps. First of all, cheers for the update on Marsha. Second of, I’m not sure why I was supposed to tell Karl that thing with Boris. You do know that he skypes with that dog, right? Thirdly, I’m still on the fence regarding most of the beers I’ve tried so far. And yeah, the one’s that I tried; because Karl just sticks to one and I don’t even think it’s because he deemed it particularly tasty, it’s just that he is lazy as fuck. The chances of me bringing you anything back are so-so. Fourth, you wanted me to remind you to renew your Sky subscription, so this is me doing just that. And lastly, if you happen to talk to Beth would you please explain to her that I wasn’t trying to put a spell on her boyfriend, even though he absolutely deserved to be cursed. All I said was that he’d probably get a serious allergic reaction if he decided to bathe in a river that smelled like it wasn’t filled with water but with cow piss. That Karl took that as a dare and not only bathed in there but also drank from it, can hardly be considered my fault. No spell casting or cursing involved whatsoever, if we’re not counting me calling Karl a muppet in three different languages. I gotta hang up now, I was on my way to the nearest pharmacy - you may guess why - and I’m standing in the entrance right now.

on 2017-08-13 11:27 pm (UTC)
openidwouldwork: (muuh)
Posted by [personal profile] openidwouldwork
Nothing would be wrong with Karl if it had been cow piss, let me tell you all about that...

on 2017-08-14 06:59 am (UTC)
gattodoro: (Karl)
Posted by [personal profile] gattodoro
Are we sure that it wasn't Karl's beer that smelled like cow piss?

P.E. Teachers would appear to have the mental maturity of a 4th grader, Orlando should know how to deal with that.

on 2017-08-15 07:50 pm (UTC)
noalinnea: (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] noalinnea
Sean did such a good job in bringing up Orlando, at least he knows how to compose a proper voicemal message :) (maybe that's why he's drawn to Richard's manners, because Sean doesn't have (m)any? ;))
I love that he cares enough about Marsha to let Sean know he appreciates the heads up, and how he just watches Karl bathe in cow piss (with a slight frown, I'm sure), but then goes to the pharmacy for him (awwww!). Also, Beth should've knowm he'd get into trouble...

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