Fic: Kiwi

Jul. 13th, 2017 01:47 am
afra_schatz: Made by wizzicons on LJ (Default)
[personal profile] afra_schatz
First of all, you all need to go to [personal profile] noalinnea's journal and read her AWESOME Cate fic which I can't praise enough (especially when it's the middle of the night and I can't form coherent sentences any longer :)).

Also, have something very random and nonsensical for Wednesday :)

In hindsight, Sean, Viggo, Miranda, and Dom should have listened to Orlando. But Miranda usually can trust her own judgment pretty well, Viggo would never listen to Orlando, Dom habitually doesn't listen to anyone, especially not common sense, and Sean, well Sean was pretty much the only one out of the four who arrived at Bernie's with exactly the right expectations for the evening.

The result, in all four cases, is pretty much the same. When they leave Bernie's house at around midnight, they did accomplish their goal of the evening all right; they chose ten very fine wines to give to John as a retirement gift on the party on Friday. Also, what Orlando predicted when he heard of their mid-week-wine-sampling-plan at Bernard's place aka Dionysus's Yorkshire headquarters? Exactly what happened. All for of them are royally and utterly pissed.

Miranda (very wisely) takes up Marianne's offer to kip on their couch. Dom falls asleep against a traffic light when they walk back, and Sean and Viggo only notice five minutes later that they left him behind and then decide that it's not really worth going back. Sean drunk-dials Orlando to tell him – well, yell at him because Sean doesn't really have a concept of noise when he is sloshed, thankfully they are in the middle of the forest – that he is really bummed about missing out on the motorcycle trip to Poland with Karl and Orlando. Orlando, in his caring and empathetic way, tells him to go fuck himself, hangs up and goes back to sleep. Viggo in the meantime makes retching noises at Sean; not so much in response to the sentimentality per se but because of the sentimentality being directed at 'that faithless robot-demon and the smelly what's that fruit again? Piyata? No... Avocado? Hmm, no. Something else. Greener. And hairy. Though I could eat an avocado now. Have you ever tried avocado with garlic, Sean?'.

Sean for his part is not necessarily the best person to be around when drunk, though. He has been known to be an enabler when pissed. And also even more hungry than usual.

Which is why, at 1.30 a.m. Eric enters Arnor House's common kitchen to investigate suspicious noises to find Viggo slicing fruits and vegetables while Sean apparently has a conversation with someone's answering service.

on 2017-07-13 02:37 pm (UTC)
openidwouldwork: (Ben)
Posted by [personal profile] openidwouldwork
Who? The Kiwi?

on 2017-07-13 09:42 pm (UTC)
noalinnea: (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] noalinnea
I'll just assume 'Eric' is the word that's missing in the last paragraph, because who would be up at night in Arnor House if not Eric who's missing Viggo? And because then the story can continue like this:

Eric halts in the doorway and takes in the picture that's presenting itself to him: Viggo is at the kitchen counter, barefoot, a kitchen towel flung over his shoulder and humming amelodically to himself while he appears to be peeling a cucumber. Sean is leaning against the fridge and appears to be not far away from sliding to the floor while he is talking into his phone, not using his indoor voice. Maybe because the phone is upside down. Or maybe because he is trying to get Orlando to wake up three houses away so that he can properly scold him for going on holidays with Karl and not with him.

When there are footsteps behind him and a sleepy voice asks: 'Um, Mr. Bana?' Eric turns around and fleetingly wishes he had had the sense to put on slightly more clothes than a t-shirt and Viggo's checkered pajama bottoms when he encounters a bleary eyed second former (Franca? Francine? Amanda?).

'Go back to bed,' Eric simply says in want of a better strategy. And her name.

The girl seems to contemplate his answer for a moment before she nods and turns around to shuffle back upstairs. After a couple of steps she turns around again: 'Maybe you could ask Mr. Bean to tone it down a little, though?'

Eric just nods and turns back towards the two boozehounds. With a sigh he steps into the kitchen and makes his way over to Viggo.

Who, caught up in his little project- cucumber, paprika and kiwi salad with avocado as a side dish, as it appears- does not notice him for a moment, and only looks up when Eric reaches out to place his hand on his arm. He blinks a couple of times as if to bring him into focus but then his lips stretch into a smile. 'Hi, Eric!' he says, his voice a little hoarse, as if he's shouted his lungs out (which he probably has).

Eric nods and tries to suppress a smile. He gently wraps his fingers around Viggo's wrist and stops his mutilation of perfectly good food.

'Hi,' he says. 'So you're back?'

'Yes!' Viggo beams at him.

'I take it the evening was a success?' Eric asks and puts away the knife.

Viggo nods. 'Absoutely!'

Eric retrieves cling film from one of the drawers and starts wrapping up the vegetables and fruit Viggo has managed to slice (or chop, rather).

'That's great,' he offers, smiling at Viggo.

Viggo looks content. 'You should've come,' he says, cocking his head to the side.

Eric hums. 'Next time.'

Viggo simply nods at that, failing to remark that John probably will only retire once and therefore will only require one present.

'We can have that for breakfast tomorrow,' he then says and gestures at the vegetably and fruity mess Eric has now finshed wrapping up.

'Sure,' Eric just says and turns towards the fridge to dump everything there. Out of sight, out of mind. But Sean has still not finished his rant and is blocking the way.

Eric sighs, again, and puts down the vegetables.

'Sean,' he then says.

Sean is too busy yelling into his phone than to notice him.

Eric places a hand on his shoulder. 'Sean!' he then repeats, raising his voice.

Sean arches his eyebrows. 'What?'

'Your phone is upside down, mate,' Eric says helpfully.

Sean looks at him for a moment, puzzled.

'What?' he then asks, still not using his indoor voice.

'Your-phone-is-upside-down,' Eric repeats, enunciating clearly.

Sean looks at him for another moment, now appearing thoughtful, before he lowers his phone to look at it.

'Also, the battery seems to be empty,' Eric remarks.

'Huh,' Sean says and then shrugs and and pockets the phone. He sways a little when he pushes away from the fridge: 'I better go find Orlando then,' he says, half directed at himself, half at Eric.

Eric pats his shoulder: 'Sure, mate, you do that.'

Sean nods and manages to only walk into three pieces of furniture on the way out. It's quiet in the kitchen when the sound of the front door being slammed shut dies down. Eric turns around to find Viggo fast asleep in on of the chairs, his head resting on his arms on the table.

He contemplates just letting him sleep there but then decides to take him upstairs, for entirely selfish reasons, really. He puts the vegetables into the fridge and quickly wipes the worktop down with the dishcloth before he walks over to Viggo. Reaching out to card his fingers through his hair he says quietly:

'Wake up, Viggo.'

Viggo barely stirs, and Eric bends down to him and presses a kiss against his stubbly cheek. 'Wake up, sleeping beauty,' he says, a little louder, and Viggo opens his eyes.

'Huh?' he asks, clearly at a loss as to where he is.

Eric hooks his hand under his arm and pulls him to his feet: 'Let's get you to bed,' he suggests, and Viggo just nods.

Eric wraps his arm around his shoulders when he switches off the kitchen lights and Viggo leans his head against his shoulder and let's himself be lead upstairs.

'Did you have a good time?' Eric asks quietly when they are turning into the corridor that leads to Viggo's flat.

'Yes.' Viggo nods. 'You weren't there, though,' he then remarks, sounding a little wistful.

'I know,' Eric answers and turns his head to drop a kiss onto Viggo's forehead.

Viggo stops and lifts his head to smile at him in the dim light of the corridor.

'Next time,' he says and reaches out to trail his fingers over Eric's cheek.

Eric leans into the touch and nods. 'Yeah, next time.'

(oh, look, it turned out to be real ficlet! Let's give it a name, then. Cling film.)

on 2017-07-14 04:08 pm (UTC)
noalinnea: (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] noalinnea
:) I like the V/E cling film metaphor, because, yes, that sounds about right! The expensive kind of cling film that clings really tightly. Heavy duty weapons grade cling film (the one you use to keep premature newborns snuggly).
And I totally just copied your Eric's way of dealing with the students in the POLW fix because man, that was so hilarious! And the shepard dog image is awesome - look out for them that none gets lost or killed, but it's really just a very basic strategy he's running with, nothing compared to Viggo's, Sean's or Orlando's masterful shepherdery (that might not be a word...)
I'm not sure if Sean ever made it over to Orlando's house, he might have fallen asleep on the way over, but if he did I want to read about Orlando's reaction! :)

on 2017-07-17 01:02 pm (UTC)
gattodoro: (Eric as Hector)
Posted by [personal profile] gattodoro
I can't imagine Orlando will be as gentle with Sean as Eric is with Viggo (aww, how sweet), but then again Sean probably enjoys riling Orlando up.

on 2017-07-17 06:43 pm (UTC)
noalinnea: (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] noalinnea
Haha, no, if he actually made it over to Mirkwood House and didn't make a beeline for his bed after all, I imagine that there was some shouting (until Orlando closed the door in his face and threatened never to watch Emmerdale with him again, never ever, if he didn't go away, and Sean went muttering to the common room and crashed on the couch)... maybe it's not so much riling Orlando up, I think that's usually just something Sean watches with amusement if it happens, but I think he's actually upset because he usually spends some part of the holidays with Orlando and doesn't need that routine to change.
Glad you enjoyed Eric and Viggo and their weird togetherness! :)

on 2017-07-17 12:59 pm (UTC)
gattodoro: (Just whistle)
Posted by [personal profile] gattodoro
Faithless robot-demon? Love it. *GGG*

Someone should fit a silencer to Sean.


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